What’s in my Fridge

Pretzel Dog

So, my birthday was last week and guess what I got? No, not a new brain. I got a new bike. See, my father says everything’s negotiable and when the person didn’t want to sell the bike, I offered him a million billion dollars. He still said no, so I stole it. But, then I […]

How to Make Fried Rice

How to make Fried Rice

How to Make Fried Rice In honor of President’s Day, Shorty and I decided to stimulate the economy and buy some dinner. We had gone out to the Palm Springs desert to get away for a few days, relax in the sun and frolic by the pool. (editors note, I do not know why I […]

Sunset Tan Janelle Perry Loves Fat Jewish Guy

Sunset Tan Janelle Perry Loves Fat Jewish Guy. Sorry mom. I am in love with a shiksa. Janelle is perfect. Think she would appreciate our family dinners? Think Janelle would enjoy the 5 course meals? Or do you think she might just nibble on the Carpas while we pig out on meatballs, turkey, brisket, kasha, […]

I Hate Computers!

I know it’s counterintuitive for someone who has a blog, but I hate the internet. I have spent all night trying to reconfigure this website, that I almost forgot to eat. Almost, because somehow I managed to fit in dinner (steak, fries, corn) and also a bowl of soup. Believe it or not, I woke […]

The Economist Hates Israel

I was reading in the bathroom today. I had a choice between Sharper Image and The Economist. Digesting food makes me feel intellectual, so I flipped open the pages and started reading an article. It happened to be about Israel and I kept reading. Biased is not a word to describe this piece. To be […]

No Soup For You

This weeks Torah portion talks about Jacob deceiving Esau by telling trading him lentil soup for his birthright. Dude. Totally good deal. I don’t know if I would trade my birthright for some lentil soup, but if it was cream of barley I would be all over it. We know the rest of the story. […]

Eye Of The Tiger

I may be delusional. There is a slight possibility of this. Let me explain. With 8 minutes left in the Eagles game today, down by 24 points, I totally expected that we would come back. I mean, it’s the Eagles were are talking about. Any other football team I would have turned off the game […]