Lead Story

Long day. Still can’t talk about it, but lets just say that my life can now be called San Diego Legal. As I was walking out of the courthouse, there was a nice immigrant selling coffee. I decided to support him in his quest to better himself and bought a cup. The coffee was great, […]

Knocked Up

I can’t believe they made a movie about me. I just saw knocked up and it was amazing. So many similarities. I mean it’s really weird. Though I will say that I didn’t get fat over a nine month period. I didn’t work for E. I also didn’t have a melt down in the middle […]

Bucket of Fire

So now I am thirty. My back hurts. My prostate is inflamed. I hate my kids. So I did what every 30 year old does. I went out and bought a sports car. It’s awesome. 2007 Porche. Red. Buckets seats. Die cast metal. Fits in my pocket. You know what also fits in my pocket? […]

The Roof The Roof The Roof Is On ….

Yeah….. It was my birthday. I woke up to fresh Dunkin Donuts coffee and dark chocolate. No brisket today. There was a party to be had. A nice 40 minute drive north and I was working on 3 computers at once. I love doing it, but the treat was when lunch was served. Chicken taquitos, […]

Last Post In My 20’s

Thirty years and nine months ago my parents made whoopie. Dad was probably dancing to the sweet sounds of KC and the Sunshine Band. Mom was doing the hustle. And after a long night of cigarettes and disco they made a baby. It was a long 9 months, but it was worth it as a […]

No Soup For You

This weeks Torah portion talks about Jacob deceiving Esau by telling trading him lentil soup for his birthright. Dude. Totally good deal. I don’t know if I would trade my birthright for some lentil soup, but if it was cream of barley I would be all over it. We know the rest of the story. […]

The Holy Grail

You know what? I don’t care about anything that happened today. Yes, it started it good. I was doing some work up North. True, it was a productive day. But, as we learn, what goes up must come down. As I was driving to Hebrew School my car started to smoke. No, not like Marlboro’s. […]