The title of this post was supposed to be “infected root canal and painkilling mouth gel”, however, my stupid voice recognition combined with my East Coast accent and infected post root canal tooth, decided that I was trying to say “mouth Joe” and I actually had to turn it off for a second and manually type in gel so that I could explain what I was talking about. On the plus side, I learned I have a pretty heavy accent.
I have an infected tooth and they had to do a root canal and then the dentist took two weeks off and let me deal with the pain and the most horrible taste ever in my mouth. You would think someone who is in intense pain every day could deal with a tooth who’s root has been killed, but then you would be thinking wrong.
Now, besides my shoulder hurting badly because of the wet winter weather, I also have to deal with a tooth that hurts really badly and a foul-smelling ooze that makes me think I have ninja turtles in my mouth.
In fact had I had ninja turtles in my mouth it might explain how my tooth got infected.
I got this really cool gel by the way, however the consistency of it is really funky. I can’t explain it. It is not really gel and it’s not really liquid and it doesn’t have the consistency of lotion, but, I guess the best way to describe it would be if you took Jell-O ground it up in a blender till it became liquid but still gelled and shoved it in a tube. Anyway, this stuff is made out of lidocaine which I don’t know what that is but I am assuming that anything that ends in Caine has qualities of numbness (it even applies to Michael).
Think about it, Novocain, lidocaine, cocaine, membrane…? Actually I don’t think membrane counts, but the other three do. Swish the stuff in your mouth and you feel like you’re going to choke and then you spit it out and about 10 seconds later the most miraculous thing happens, your whole mouth goes numb, not just numb but tingly numb.
Now I know why in the movies they always do a line of cocaine and then put the rest of it on their teeth. The gel makes my tooth feel better but it makes the rest of my mouth feel like it’s going to a party.
So that’s pretty much it, I hope the rest of you out there with root canal’s aren’t having a bad time as I am, but I do have a question if someone happens to know the answer, What is the proper way to tell somebody what is wrong with me? “Am I suffering because of the root canal or because of an infected tooth?”
Basically, if someone says to me, how are you feeling? Should I respond with oh I am in so much pain because of a root canal or do I respond, Uchh (a jewish guttural sound) my tooth hurts so badly because it’s infected like some 70-year-old Jewish person? You may think these are trivial questions, however learning to complain about your ailments is something that everybody in my tribe needs to learn how to master.