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There has been a lot of talk lately about how Jesse James is despicable for ruining Sandra Bullock’s Oscar moment with his penis.

While I think that having an affair with a Nazi fetish tattoo model is kind of hot but definitely wrong, let me defend Jesse James for a minute.

I think that Jesse James is not baby Killer, but a Mother F@cker.

Pretend for a minute that I am walking down the street when I see the hottest woman I have ever seen in my life.

I am telling you that this chick is hot.

I walk up to her, start talking and next thing you know me and her are back at my place.

We start kissing and after a few drinks I try and take off her extremely short skirt.

The girl says no, but she playfully tells me that I am so irresistible and that since there is a recession she will be giving me a special kind of “job.”

When we are done two minutes later, the girl looks at me as she is putting her shirt back on and tells me that 5 years ago she used to be a man.

My question is am I gay?

Yup, if I had no idea that this “girl” used to be a man does that make me gay?

I would think that the answer to that is no.

This brings me to Jesse James.

According to every article written Jesse James started cheating on Sandra Bullock while she was FILMING the Blind Side.

This makes him guilty of being a pig.

BUT, it does not make him guilty of being a horrible person.

Here is an article written the day after the Oscars called “Oscar’s Worth Depends on Your Agent” (http://www.newser.com/story/82821/oscars-worth-depends-on-your-agent.html)

“Sandra Bullock probably isn’t so lucky. When she signed onto The Blind Side, insiders say it’s unlikely she negotiated any Oscar bonuses from Warner Bros. It just didn’t seem possible at the time she’d even be in contention.”

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So, if people in Hollywood didn’t even think that she would win an Academy Award, then Jesse James wasn’t trying to “ruin her moment” by cheating on her.

Also, there is speculation that Jesse James couldn’t handle a powerful woman and he had to sabotage the relationship by showing he was in command.

Let’s remember that at the time of filming, he was a reality star and she was known for such roles as All about Steve. (worst actress)

So, I know I will be attacked by my mother for this post.

But, I want to be clear what I am saying.

Jesse James may be a pig.

Jesse James may be a cheater.

Jesse James may like Nazi Fetish Models.

HOWEVER, Jesse James was not out to destroy Sandra Bullock and ruin her moment.

When this affair allegedly started there was no moment.

There was no Oscar.

As for my mother.

I love her, but I wonder if there is anyway that she could have some sort of unhealthy crush on Sandra Bullock?

I honestly believe that if Sandra Bullock swore off men due to this experience and decided to settle down with an elderly Jewish lady, my mother would consider bringing, “Sandy” to passover.

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