Lis Wiehl Face of Betrayal Review
Tonight I was gonna review Hot Fox News Analyst Lis Wiehl‘s book, Face of Betrayal.
Before I do though, I want to say a few things.
First of all, what kind of spelling is Lis?
I searched google all day long for Liz Wiehl and couldn’t find anything.
Google didn’t even try to correct me like they normally do.
They were just like, nope, sorry, nothing here.
Anyway, the other thing I want to address is that when I watch Megyn Kelly and Lis Wiehl on O’Reilly there is definitely a part of me that perks up.
Now that you mention it, why can’t Megyn Kelly spell her name either?
It’s like a hot chick spelling conspiracy.
By the way, Lis and Megyn if you are reading this, I agree with Megyn about what you were fighting about on O’Reilly about tonight.
Now, this isn’t about how hot Lis Wiehl is, it’s supposed to be a book review.
Before I get there though, I want to talk about what happened tonight and maybe Lis and her husband Uber Lawyer Mickey Sherman will be able to help me. (if they stop laughing first)
Since there is a possibility that I could die on Friday, I decided to go to LA for my last meal.
I realized that I never had fried chicken and Shorty told me that I have to try this place called Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles.
I was all excited to go, and we even took separate cars so I could sleep on the beach and see the sun rise for one last time.
She tried to tell me that the sun doesn’t rise on the West Coast but I don’t believe her.
Anyway, after pulling over and getting coffee, I needed to get back on the freeway.
(for legal reasons this next part is completely made up)
So, I am trying to pull out of the gas station and have two choices.
The first was to make a right hand turn, then a u turn, then a left hand turn at the light.
The second was to make a right out of the gas station and make a u turn at the light.
I chose the latter, since the first way there were cones there and I didn’t want to break the law.
However, I misjudged the turn and ended up perpendicular to the road (almost like a T) while I waited for the light to turn green, then I pulled the U Turn.
As I made my U Turn (allegedly) I was signing along to Kate Perry’s I kissed a Girl song and then I saw the lights.
I stuck my gimp hand out the window and motioned for the cops to follow me into a parking lot.
They did and that’s when it happened.
They drew their weapons as they came to my car.
I was freaking out.
I rolled down my window and asked them what happened?
The White cop asked me if I knew why I was pulled over.
I said no.
He said, “you didn’t see that U Turn sign?”
So I was like, “I guess that’s why you pulled me over.”
Then things got crazy.
Instead of asking me for my license, he asked me if I had a license.
Well, I am a good Jewish Boy and was like, here you go.
Then he asked me for my registration.
And looked some more.
The cop was like, do you have insurance?
I was like, yeah, 21st century.
He almost slapped me and said, “can I have proof?”
I was like, sure.
So, I kept looking.
(note to self, throw away all your old parking tickets because cops can see the yellow)
“Sorry officer, I can’t find my insurance card, but if you let me dial my phone I can call the insurance company for you,” I said.
Guess what, it doesn’t work that way.
So officer one goes back to the car, while officer 2 shines a Mag light in my face and starts questioning me.
Have you ever been arrested.
Are you sure?
Where are you going?
To eat Fried Chicken, because I may be dying.
Really, (he put the flashlight down) what do you have?
Then we both started laughing.
Ok, so the fistula part didn’t happen, but I did tell him that I was driving to LA to get some chicken.
After he realized I was not drunk or high, just stupid, he got a lot cooler and asked me how I didn’t see the u turn sign and that the reason he stopped me was because I was perpendicular to the street and he thought I was in an accident.
When I explained to him how I came to be in that position he shook his head and told me that I just admitted to committing a few more violations.
Then we talked some more.
More cops came and had hands on their hips.
Finally after an hour, cop one comes back and gives me a ticket for the U Turn and says he will give me a break on the insurance and registration.
So, that was my night.
As I was driving through the mountains of California, thinking about my potential last few day’s on this earth, I put on the easy listening station on Sirius and started signing along.
It was a long day and the sweet sounds of Roberta Flack made me happy.
“Strumming my pain with his fingers.
Singing my life with his words.
Killing me softly with his song.”
What a sweet sweet melody and great lyrics.
As I was groovin to the sweet sounds of the 70’s I started thinking.
What if Roberta Flack was using code.
What if Pain means Vagina?
What if Singing means Penetrating?
What if Life means Legs and Words means Penis?
And if Killing means licking and song means Tongue then this has got to be the dirtiest song ever.
As for Lis Wiehl’s Book, Face of Betrayal?
It really is a masterpiece.
Not that I am a book critic or anything, but after reading what both these hot women have to offer, I am truly amazed that anyone ever thought women were dumb.
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