Living With Diabetes Fat Jewish Guy Style

I have Diabetes.

And you don’t.

Well, maybe you do, but lets be honest, this is about me right now.

Woke up this morning and made some fried chicken.

Then had a handful of Obama’s Chocolate Balls and washed it down with some club soda.

Drove to the doctor’s office and was 30 minutes late because I got lost.

I wasn’t happy.

Little did I know my weekend was about to be ruined.

Life as I know it is about to change.

The doctor comes in the room and starts to go over my blood work.

High cholesterol, high triglycerides, high blood sugar, high blood pressure, etc.

You get the point.

By chance, a drug rep was in the office and by chance he was the rep for Vytorin.

The doctor asked me if he could share my case with the guy and I said yes.

Maybe I can be in a commercial.

Anyway, the rep looked over my blood work and decided that, "why yes, I should be on Vytorin"

So then the doctor calls me into his office and tells me the news.

I have diabetes.

Not that pussy pre-diabetic kind either.

I am in stage 1.

But, we caught it early, so that’s ok.

Got some more drugs, which thankfully were not pushed upon me by a rep.

Amazingly, he took the time to talk to me for an hour explaining what we are going to do.

I lost interest in one minute and started text messaging.

Somewhere along the line, I heard something about losing a foot.

At that point I started paying attention again.

Anyway, I got my prescriptions, scheduled my follow up appointment and got in the car.

Drove straight to 7-11 and ate a 1/4 pound Big Bite.

I needed comfort.

Then, I wen to the pharmacy, where I proceeded to tell the guy behind the counter that, "I have diabetes." He didn’t seem to care.

As I was waiting for the drugs to be ready, I walked next door and ate some sushi.

Dynamite roll, tuna roll, seaweed salad.

Then I picked up the drugs and went home.

Shorty was waiting for me, very upset and concerned about me.

I was just tired.

We left to go away for the weekend.

When we stopped for a smoke break, I bought some Mike and Ikes.

I will miss them.

Finally we got to her Uncle’s house and went to diner.

I had a salad.

And.

Wait for it.

Wait for it.

Wait for it.

A Ribeye Steak.

Now, I am sitting on the couch, contemplating the future.

I’m just gonna eat all the yummy foods I want over the weekend and Monday morning I will start fresh with salads, yogurt and healthy foods.

One last hurrah.

That’s all I want.

So, as of Monday, join me daily for my new take on life and let’s take the Die out of Diabetes together.

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